Akwaaba!

Akwaaba is by far the phrase I have heard the most while being here in Ghana! It means welcome, and I have never felt more welcomed by a groups of people/country before! From the moment I stepped off the plane I was greeted with a sea of smile. This will forever be the lasting first impression I have of Ghana. I was met at the airport by a man named Fred who then took me on a crazy adventure to get to the guest house where I am living until the 18th. It was a very interesting introduction to the country. The driving here is absolutely crazy! I do not know if people actually realize that there are two sides of the road one for each direction for traffic! People drive where ever they want to and often just barely miss having huge collisions. Some roads are in fairly good conditions, however overall most of the roads are in a state of disrepair and more often then not you feel as though you are off roding. There are also people everywhere you look! always people hanging out by the sides of the road and when you are driving there are constantly people coming up to your window trying to sell you something. I am constantly blown away by the fact that the women here can carry anything and everything on their heads, and most of them do it while also balancing a baby on their back! I am in awe of the balance!

I was the first of the WUSC volunteers to arrive in Ghana so I was alone that night at the guest house. It was a very overwhelming feeling of loneliness that I was not expecting! I do not know why I had not prepared myself for i, I usually adjust very quickly to new situations and just figured I would be so busy that I would not really have time to over think things. This however was not the case. I was dropped off at the guest house at 7 and then left alone there. This gave me way to much time to think! I also was unsure about the proper etiquette of staying in a guest house. Was i supposed to just stay in my room? Should I wander outside and talk to people? I stayed in my room for a while, but eventually was so stir crazy for someone to talk to I went on an adventure to explore the compound. I ran into Ben the man who owns the guest house and ended up chatting to him for the longest time. He is the nicest man and the best comparrison I have for you to give you an idea of what he looks like and how he acts is Bill Cosby from the Cosby show. He is the nicest man! He gave me a Ghanaian name. I am now Akua Katie (because I was born on a Wednesday). He told me a lot about Ghana and made me feel very at home.

The next day I came to WUSC offices and met everyone who works there. Then Fred and I went out to go change some of my money and to buy me some food. It feels so strange to be the only white person anywhere here. Some of the little children who have never seen a white person before do not know if they should run away or towards me haha. Cries of 'Obruni' seem to follow wherever I go. It means white person. I have also learned how to say No, it is Dabbi. There are a few more phrases but I do not know how to spell them and do not want to butcher the Twi language so I will fill you in when I get the spellings for them.

After going out with Fred for the day I went back to the guest house and yet again had way to much time to simply sit and think. I ended up working myself up to the point where I felt sick and ended up curling up on my giant bed (honestly I have never seen a bigger bed in my whole life) and falling asleep. I think my body was just overtired and a little messed up from the long plane rides and time changes. I felt a little better when I woke up, however still felt lonely, anxious and as if I wanted to catch the next plane home. However after sitting down for a moment and weighing my options to either let my loneliness get me down or to buck up, put a smile on my face and put myself out there until I began to feel more at home. I chose the later option and am so grateful I did. Not long after this another girl arrived from Ottawa. Her name is Amelie and we immediately became friends! It is so nice to have someone who is going through the same adjustment period, and understands what you are feeling! We stayed up talking most of the night and both went to bed glad to know there was someone else in the same boat.

Yesterday we took an excursion out to see the village I will be living and working in. I met the director of FAWE and she was so kind and welcoming that I know I will be well cared for this summer. The journey out to Fotobi took about an hour from Accra, and at time the roads were so bad I felt as if the car was going to break =S There is a larger city/town close to my village (7 km) away I think. It is called Naswam and it is where I will be going to get any supplies I need while I am in Fotobi. When we were driving out there were to many animals walking down the sides of the road - goats, cows (which are mush different from the cows at home), chickens and so much more! We began to drive by a lot of shack like structures, houses made from scrap metal or tree branches, some that only had three walls instead of four. I was beginning to get a little worried about the living conditions that I would find myself in for the summer. I can rough it with the best of them, but I was not sure how it would work with a family and me in an area as big as half of my room at school and only three walls. However I kept reminding myself that it is all part of the adventure and if I did find myself in that situation I could make it work, and in Hindsight it is really only 3 and a half months of my life right? Just another adventure, just another part of the journey. As we got into Fotobi we stopped at the FAWE offices. I was able to meet a lot of the people who work there and get a feeling for what it is they do. I found out more about how the organization first began and how it has been transformed over the years in Ghana. It used to be located in the capital city (ACCRA) but was moved out to the country because they wanted to start a radio station and could only get a license if they moved the operation out into the country. The radio station is to promote education of girls, and the men who were doing the shows when I was there were extremely funny. I look forward to working with them and maybe even learning more about how a radio station works! In Ghana it is law that if you have an FM radio station you also have a security guard on duty 24 hours a day 7 days a week. This is due to the fact that if there were to ever be a political coup they do not want them to be able to capture a radio station as a means of communicating with others involved or as a way of gaining more support. I would have never thought about that, but it makes so much sense! At the offices they also have a huge library of resources pertaining to women and HIV/AIDS. Apparently many people in University who study these topics travel here to do their research. Julianna the director said that I would be welcome to use the resources anytime I would like, so I may be able to do some really interesting school work while here.

After we saw the FAWE offices we drove down the road for a while (maybe 5 minutes) to get to the school I am gong to be working at. It is an all girls Senior high school so most of the girls are anywhere from 13 - 17. There are 104 students enrolled right now. Right now the students are in the middle of their exams so they are just studying around the school. I met the headmaster and he gave me a tour around the school building. There are 4 classrooms and a room that they are turning into a library. I found out that on top of teaching English (which I may be doing by myself now...eeek!) I will also be organizing the library and creating a cataloguing system, etc. This will be very exciting since I have never before in my life taught English or organized a library. I have no idea what I am getting myself into, but I am sure it will all work out in the end. =) I met some of the senior girls who were studying in one of the classrooms. Here whenever a teacher or someone who is an elder or in a position of authority walks into the classroom they all stand up. They also have developed the skill of speaking in unison and it really threw me off at first. I was told later that they always do this and that it is a sign of respect. We have definitely lost a lot of the acts of showing respect in Canada (Western culture in general). When I was being introduced to the class they were told that I was from Canada and had just finished my second year of University. I was then asked how old I was - I was dreading this question! When they found out I was only 19 there was a lot of talking all at once. I think that some of the girls are probably 18 if not 19 themselves even though the majority are only 17. Still that is only two years younger then me and I can see why they would be a little shocked that I was so young. I wonder how they will react to me being a teacher? I really hope that I am working with a teacher who is already there and not having to come up with my own lesson plans! What do you teach in high school English? I do not know what to do with them! But, I will figure it out when I need to... I am sure it will all work out! =)

After seeing the school building itself I got to go and see the dormitories where the some of the girls live. There are also three rooms just for the teachers of the school. I found out that I am able to stay at the school. So no host family for me, however I am very excited for the chance to live with the girls! It will almost be like I am at camp again! I really hope that I am able to become friends with them and they do not see me as just being a teacher. But I will cross that bridge when it comes! I was also able to meet two ladies who cook for the school and was told that they would be able to help me get everything I need to cook this summer, or they would be able to make food for me. It is a huge relief to know that there are people around who will be able to help and give me some advice! Also the main cook has the cutest girl! I am very excited to get to know her this summer!

Behind the school there is the most breathtaking view! there are huge hills almost like mountains covered in beautiful trees and other crazy vegetation. I think there may also be a small community on the mountain, I think I saw some fields/gardens half way up the side. Who knows, I will figure out more when I move there. =)

I was also told that there is a local King/chief who lives close by who I will be taken to see when I move out to the village. How crazy is that? I am going to go meet a king!! There are also some of the worlds best botanical gardens not to far from where I will be, so I am sure at least one trip will be taken there!

After visiting the school we needed to head back into Accra, however instead of having a driver we decided to use the transit system. We caught a taxi from the offices into Naswam. Although I do not think it was really a taxi, more like a bus car type thing... part way to the village a random man hopped into the back seat next to me. It really took me aback! I was not expecting it at all! it was very funny! He kept trying to guess what my Ghanaian name would be and was convinced I would have been born on a Sunday or Monday. Both Kereen (a woman who works for WUSC in Ghana) and this man were shocked when I said "No, my name is Akua Katie". They were so excited that I knew what my Ghanaian name was! After that the man became fascinated with my white skin and he kept rubbing my arm and then rubbing his as if comparing our skin. Then he kept rubbing my arm... I think he was trying to see if the white would rub off. It was very funny! He was so amazed I wonder if I was one of the first white people he has ever seen...

One thing that I did notice as we were driving back to Naswam was the drastic poverty that exists. We drove by a garbage dump at the side of the rode and there were people there searching through it for whatever they could salvage. It almost broke my heart. Fred told me later that Ghana is a very peaceful country, the only problem with it is the extreme poverty. I am not sure why there is such abject poverty, but I am determined to come to understand the situation more fully while I am living amongst it this summer! It is hard to see such poverty and neglect in a world that has so much! There are such imbalances and I do not know how we have become so self centered in the world that we either do not see the suffering around us or we choose to ignore it. I am not trying to claim that I have the answers to 'fix' the world, but I do know that we cannot continue to go on living as we are, simply focusing on ourselves and turning a blind eye to the suffering of our fellow human beings. They have a proverb in Ghana - "every human life is worth more then gold" We have moved to far away from this way of life. We need to remember that at the centre of everyone we are human. Despite all of our physical or ideological differences we are all human and as such we are more precious then gold. When we learn to treat everyone as if they are more important then gold the world will be a much happier, equal and peaceful place!

When we arrived in Naswam we hopped into a trotro (van like buses that do not have scheduled stops, people jump in and out as they want to and just hand there money to someone near the front of the vehicle. The one we took back to Accra city centre had 21 people in it at one point. These vans were not made for 21 people! I have never been so packed into a vehicle before! Especially not on such a hot day!! After we made it to the city centre we hopped onto another tro tro to take us to the Haatso pare of town where the WUSC offices and our guest house are located. I am having a very hard time trying to understand the tro tro system, though I know I have to learn it so I can get back to the city for some weekends! I am hoping that Nick is good with directions though so that there will be two of us figuring it out together!

Once we made it back to Haatso Amelie, Fred and myself went on another great adventure to the Medina section of the city. Here we bought cell phones and then went wandering into the market. This market takes the prize for being the largest market I have ever seen in my whole life! It was so full of the most random and interesting things! I am pretty sure that you could get anything you could ever need at this market! Fred took us to meet his Aunt who sells Cassava in the market. It was very nice to meet more of his family and explore more of what the city is truly like. If Fred had not been there with us I do not think we would have been able to find our way out! There are so many back alleyways and twists and turns! It is truly a remarkable place, and as always everyone was very welcoming. Ghana is by far the most hospitable place I have ever been to! After Amelie saw the food in the market - a lot of sea food and meat just sitting out in the sun she has decided to become a vegetarian for the summer. However we quickly realized that vegetarianism is unheard of in Ghana and most people think you are very strange if you do not eat meat. Meat is usually involved in every meal in some way or another. Good luck with that this summer Amelie!

Last night Amelie and I were finally able to sleep through the night! Every night that I have been here so far there has been a stupid rooster who is determined to wake me up at least every 30 minutes! I thought it was kind of funny the first night, but after that I was not amused. I was sleep deprived and it was making it hard to be upbeat and happy when placed into new situations that pushed me in certain ways. Thankfully last night the rooster did not make an appearance and then only thing that woke me up was my alarm this morning.

I have moved rooms to share one with Amelie because Nick is coming tonight and needs a room. Today we have discovered that we also have a third roommate - a little lizard that we have decided to name Kwakum (because we found him on Wednesday night and in Ghana if you are a male and born on a Wednesday you are called Kwakum). He is very cute... and we hope he has a large appetite for bugs! Another thing that I have noticed about Ghana is that they are a very religious culture. Everywhere you look there are verses from the bible or some other religious expression or reminder. Amelie and I are also rooming with Jesus. Across from the bed on the wall above the bathroom door is a large picture of Jesus. So I actually have 3 roommates now - Amelie, Kwakum and Jesus. I hope we do not gain any more roommates otherwise we will not fit into the room!

When Amelie and I were walking to offices this morning we thought we were going to die of heat! Not only was it super hot it was also super humid! When we checked the temperature it turned out to be 42 degrees with the humidity! How crazy is that?!?! 42 degrees!! We were basically melting! We decided that this was as good of a time as any to go on an excursion by ourselves so that we could feel a little more independent. We walked to the bank, then to the money exchange place. After that we took our lives in our hands running across the road to go to the little stand where Fred had taken me before to get food. The lady recognized me and was very patient with us while we were trying to order. However she did look at Amelie as if she had two heads when she said she did not want any chicken with hers. After getting our food we wandered across the street to buy some credits for our new phones. The men who were helping us at the stand were so kind! They explained everything to us. Phones here are much different from phones at home! But now we have cellphones that have credit and work to call internationally. It is also only 15 cents a minute! crazy! It is so nice to know that home is only a phone call away!

While we were out on our excursion this afternoon the sky began to get extremely dark. Even though ti was only 1 in the afternoon it looked as if it were dusk. On our way home we got stuck in our first Ghana thunderstorm, and to top it off we got lost! So Amelie and I were running around in the torrential down pour trying to find out way home to our guest house. It turns out we had walked to far back down the road and had missed our street completely! Thankfully some very nice Ghanaian men who were carpenters let us take shelter under their shops overhang until the rain slowed down a little. By the time we made it back to the guest house I was sompletelydrenched from head to toe and was covered in red mud fom the roads. However it was an adventure that neither Amelie or I will foget!

Today walking around Amelie and I have both never felt so looked at in our entire lives. Everywhere we went we were followed by cat calls and blatent stares. I am so grateful that Amelie is here with be though so I am not walking alone. I think that eventualy I will be ok walking by myself in the city, but not for a few more days. Though I am starting to pick up some of the local Twi language which does make me feel a little more comfortable.

These past few days have been quiet the adventure! I am excited to see what the future holds and what new adventures tomorrow will bring! I am very quickly falling in love with this new culture I am in the middle of, and have a feeling that despite how hard it is adjusting to this new culture it will be even harder to leave it come August.

Bubye for now! (that is how you say good bye in Ghana!)

Oh, and in the spirit of spring in Canada (the season to begin cutting the grass) be thankful for your lawnmowers! Here they cut grass by hand with machetties!

Things are not always as they appear to be...

Things are not always as they appear to be.  This is a very important thing to remember in all we do in life, but it will be crucial to remember as I along with my fellow Beyond Border students make our way around the world this summer.  Keeping an open mind about situations we find ourselves in is vital to getting all that we can from our times away.  

Try this illusion.  

If your eyes follow the rotating pink dots, the dots will remain only one colour, pink. 

How ever if you  stare at the black "+" in the centre the dot turns to green.  

This illustrates the fact that we do not always see what we think we see.  

This summer we will be put into situations we have never been in before.  We will be pushed and stretched in unimaginable ways.  Ways that will make us frustrated and uncomfortable.  However it is when we feel frustrated that we know we are growing.  

Throughout the summer it is vital that we keep our minds open.  That we are receptive to the different cultures we find ourselves a part of.  There are likely going to be things that we will disagree about, things that are so strange and foreign to us that we simply cannot come to terms with it no matter how hard we try.  For me there is one situation I know I will have a problem with... caning.  I personally am not a violent person.  I believe in dialogue and working issues out with words.  However this is not the belief shared by many education institutions in Ghana.  Caning is a fairly main stream punishment and some people who have been through the Beyond Borders program in Ghana have come home with stories of their struggles with this issue.  I know that if faced with this in my placement I will be very frustrated, and most likely a little outraged.  However, I do realize that I am not going to Ghana to change how things are.  I am going in order to gain a greater world understanding, build personal relationships and be immersed in a different culture.   There will be struggles and frustrations, however I do believe that they will come with new understandings and a greater learning experience.  

Throughout all of our experiences this summer it is crucial that we realize that things are not always as we see them to be.  We need to be very careful to hold our judgments and be open to new situations and experiences.  We are not going to change those we interact with this summer, but rather we will be changed and transformed by the things we see and are taught this summer.  This does not mean we will agree with everything we see this summer, but it does mean we must ensure we do not pre judge and situations.  We must remain open and receptive to different opinions and experiences.  This is the surest way to be transformed by our experiences this summer.  Always remember that we do not always see the entire picture, and things can (and often are) very different from what we think we see.  

The Supremacy of Fools

A poem by Roy Foster to jog your thought, I know it sure got my mind rolling! 

THE SUPREMACY OF FOOLS

As corporations

And the military/industrial complex

Ruminate over

The profit potential, 

The war-mongering capability, 

Of transgenic species

Demanding the silent 

Collaboration 

Of viruses and sheep, 

There are no tears

For the supremacy of fools.

But there are those

Among the ancient, 

the illiterate, 

The forest dwellers 

The hunters, the gatherers

With more than a day's march 

To the nearest telephone

To the closest uplink

Whose imaginations

Render trees and genes 

Sacred.

Whose personal information  

Is recorded only in the memory

Of relatives 

Living and Dead;

The elegance of sapience.  

But we are those

Whoese eyes divide

Whose minds diverge 

To avoid the holy.  

With hearts devoid

Of mystery.  

We succumb as one

To the shorn meaning

Revealed in the entrails

Of some careless machine

Savagely flung across this 

Futile landscape

Of unacknowledged ignorance

In which angels 

Fear to tread.

We succumb as one 

To the astonishingly meager

Rations of the enlightenment;

To the thin, sorrowful harvest 

Of indulgence

That cannot satisfy

Or survive

The supremacy of fools.  

There an Africa shaped hole in all of us.

This semester I took a class called Doing Development that impacted me in ways I am still discovering.  It has given me a new insight and perspective on international development (both past and present).  It has fostered a greater world understanding within me, and has caused me to deeply reflect and ponder many new concepts.  One night in class we were handed an article entitled Healing the Africa in Us by Ben Okri.  This article stopped me in my tracks.  The way Okri writes simply makes so much sense! It caused me to question my views, values and ideas of Africa (a good thing before heading over to Ghana for 3 1/2 months).  However, the article did not just cause me to question, it also increased my excitement for my placement this summer.  Now more then ever I believe that going to Africa is a vital step in creating a different world.  

"There is a realm inside every human being that is Africa.  We all have an Africa within us.  And so, when the Africa outside is sick with troubles, the Africa inside us makes us ill with neuroses."  Part of the reason there are so many issues plaguing the world today is because of the problems facing Africa.  "We have to heal the Africa outside us if the human race is going to be at peace again in a new dynamic way."  The world today is facing many crises.  We live in a troubled time, and one reason for this is the immense amount of suffering and the multitude of troubles facing Africa at the moment.  These troubles are directly related to the suffering of the world.  Problems facing Africa effect everyones lives.  They can effect health, sleep, anxiety, and unknown suffering; it is very possible to suffer without recognizing it.  

"We have to heal the Africa within each of us. We have to rediscover the true Africa." Africa is an absolutely wonderful continent.  We need to trade in our prepositions about Africa, which are for the most part misconceptions.  Misconceptions that have been bequeathed to future generations.  Africa was not seen for its beautiful, kind and caring nature.  For the most part Africa was seen from a view point of greed.  It was viewed with the question "What can I get out of it"

"The world should now begin to see the light, to see its brightness, its brilliance, its beauty."  Africa has been waiting for centuries for people to come and discover what it truly is.  However, there can be no true understanding without love.  "We have to learn to love the Africa within us."  "There is no true seeing seeing without love.  We have to learn to love the Africa in us if humanity is going to begin to to know true happiness on this earth."   We need to discover the Africa that is within each one of us.  It is sunshine, and vibrance.  It is spiritual.  Africa is not the dark and forbearing place that most people in the West make it out to be.  Africa fosters a culture of hope, perseverance, loyalty and love.  

Until we find and heal the Africa inside us there is little if any hope for creating a world of total understanding and peace.  "We love the America in us.  We love the Europe in us. The Asia in us we are beginning to respect.  Only the Africa in us is left unloved, unseen, unappreciated.  The first step toward the regeneration of humanity is making whole again all these great continents within us.  We are the sum total of humanity.  Every individual is all of humanity.  It is Africa's turn to smile... then humanity can begin to think of the universe."  

Dare to Dream of Something Different

The world we live in is less then ideal to say the least.  We live in a world of hate, fear, and violence.  We live at a time in which a small minority of rich people are able to continuously grow wealthy on the exploitation of many.  The gap between the rich and the poor continues to grow at a rapid rate.  In the world today medical epidemics run ramped.  Millions of people in Africa are dying from malaria, typhoid, yellow fever, and AIDS.  how can the world let this happen? With all of the medical technology and advancements of our 'modern' world it should be impossible for so many to be left to simply die.  What kind of world do we live in where it is worth more to a drug company to give a white man an erection than cure a black man of AIDS? How can we put a measure on human life like this? How can so much discrimination still be alive and thriving in our world?  We live in a world where many are forced to go hungry.  How is it that the world can produce such an abundance of food yet so many are left without?  We live in a world where some women are unable to walk outside alone without being in danger, a world where girls simply walking to school have been attacked with battery acid.  We live in a world where it is "honorable" to kill a daughter/sister/wife/cousin who has brought 'shame' to the family or has been 'promiscuous' in some way (this includes refusing to enter into a forced marriage).  There are little if any consequences for the killers of these women.  In fact if the killer is actually prosecuted it is rare for them to receive more then a 3 month sentence.  We live in a world of great connectedness, yet so many are forgotten and pushed to the margins.  Over 3 billion people (almost half of the worlds population) live on less then $2.50 a day.  Even in Canada 1 in every 6 children are poor.  How is this possible in a country that supposedly has such great social assistance? How do we fail to see the needs of those in out own communities?  In Canada 57,000 families occasionally have nothing to eat.  This should not be happening in a country of such abundance.  It is so twisted that we over consume at an alarming rate while others around us have nothing.  

It is impossible to deny that the world we live in is a bleak place.  Disappointment and discouragement lies around every corner.  However, we have two choices.  We can choose to lie down and accept the way the world is, accept the disparities and injustices as just a fact of life... OR We can Dare to Dream of Something Different!  If we cannot imagine a different world then we cannot work towards creating change.  Change is not something that one person will implement, rather it is something that must be created by a collective group of people working together, sharing visions and supporting each other in action.  It must be the 'oppressed' coming together to overcome their oppression.  It is like it says in the Pedagogy of The Oppressed, oppressors cannot 'liberate' anyone.  Liberation and change must come from a collective effort.  

So go ahead, dream of something different.  I am not joking! Close your eyes and think of what you wish the world could look like.  Is there a particular color, sounds, taste, or smell? O recently spent a significant amount of time reflecting on this and simply imagining what I wish the world could look like.  I am going to try to explain the vision I held with you.  When I first closed my eyes I saw green.  Green in my mind represents sustainability, a renewal of our connectivity with nature.  A harmony of balance found in sustainable growth and a re-found respect for the nature around us.  It represents the idea that we inherit the earth from our parents, it is a gift, yet at the same time we are borrowing it from out children.  It is our responsibility to leave the earth the same, if not a little better then we found it.  Next I heard the sound of water rushing in a nearby stream.  Fresh, pure, clean water.  In my mind this represents everyone having equal access to resources.  No one should hold a monopoly on natural resources that are vital to human existence (such as water).  Not long after, I heard children laughing.  there is something so precious and beautiful about the laugh of a child.  Certain things need to be in place in order for a child to laugh fully and freely.  A child needs to feel safe and secure.  They need to be provided for (not sick and hungry).  In my mind, hearing children laughing fully and freely represents a world where the innocence of children is respected and protected.  There are no child soldiers or children being trafficked; no exploitation of child labor.   In my vision there is also no distinction of race.  It is not that people are not of different ethnicities and races, however it simply does not matter.  Everyone is human and due to this fact everyone should be treated in the same manner.  Among the older population there is a diverse range of conversations taking place.  However, throughout all of these conversations there is a common theme; respect.  No matter how different people's opinions are there are no raised voices, no one dominating the conversation, no one speaking in a patronizing tone.  There is a strong sense of community.  A sense of caring, compassion and love the infects everyones actions.  

In my imagined world everyone would care about the well being of others as much as their own well-being.  In order to create a more hospitable, loving and caring world we need to begin to care about others more.  We need to be more conscious about how our actions effect those around us.  The phrases survival of the fittest and every man for himself need to disappear from our vocabulary.  Until we truly learn what it is to live out the golden rule in all our actions there will continue to be hate, fear and violence in our world.  We need to move beyond our individualistic society and learn to operate as a whole.  We need to recognize and address the needs of those in our communities.  And we need to STOP OVER-CONSUMING!! 

Change is possible, but first we must dare to dream of something different! 

What would you do differently if you could do it all again?

Life is something that moves quickly, you get into a routine and it just goes.  Time starts to go by more quickly with every passing year.  This is just the way things are, and it is a rare thing that we stop and reflect on life, about what we truly want to do until it is to late.  This weekend I heard the song Live like you were dying by Tim McGraw on the radio and it got me thinking about reflecting on life, especially before it is to late.  I do not want to go through life stuck in the rut of a routine, not taking time to "smell the roses".  All to often in life taking time out of our busy days seems like such an imposition.  We do not take time to stay connected, we dash from place to place without really enjoying what we are doing, we are always dwelling on the past or worrying about the future (we rarely take time to be fully in the present moment).  

This past week I have been reflecting on different aspects of my life, and critically reflecting if my life as it is right now is what I would want it to be if I were to die tomorrow.  It is silly to put things off until tomorrow because we never know how many tomorrows we have, or how many tomorrows those we love have.  I have decided that some things need to change in my life.  School will still be a priority in my life, however its position of importance will no longer make me miss out on other things life has to offer.  I want to experience all of the different things that life has to offer.  I do not want to realize in 20 years that all I did in university was keep my head in my books.  In 20 years I will most likely not remember the paper that is due in two weeks that I have yet to begin, I am much more likely to remember the relationships that I have with people.  I have realized that the world will not fall apart if I do not check my email every 30 minutes.  I do not always need to have my cell phone on me.  People in the past survived without cell phones and instant communication, why do we feel so disconnected and isolated now if we do not have these things? We have heard from health providers that one glass of wine a day is good for your health.  Is it really the wine that is good for you? or is it the fact that you have taken that time out of your day to sit down and have a glass of wine, maybe while chatting with a friend.  I do not think that it is the wine that helps, it is the slowing down and taking the time to connect and form good interpersonal relationships.  

I have realized that there is no knowing what will happen in the future, this year alone 4 people who I live with at school have lost a parent, and multiple others have been diagnosed with cancer or other very serious diseases.  You never know how many days you have left with people, or how many days you yourself have left.  I have decided to make everyday count.  I do not want to go to bed leaving things undone, leaving things unsaid.  I do not want to have any regrets later.  This is not to say that I will not make mistakes in life and possibly regret something that I did, but I do not want to leave something unsaid or undone and always be left wondering "what if".  Sometimes it is the small things that can make all of the difference in a persons day.  One smile can truly change someone's life.  

So stop putting things off, waiting until you have life under control, because by the time you feel things are under control it may be to late.  Start living your life today.  Dream like you will live forever and live like you will die tomorrow.  Put yourself out there.  Get dirty, experience everything.  But most important build and foster relationships with those around you.  Become involved with the community, and cherish every moment! 

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER - By Erma Bombeck (written after she found out she was dying of cancer)

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over for dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded. 

I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth. 

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have sat on the lawn with my grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.  

I would have never bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, 'Later.  Now go get washed up for dinner.' There would be more 'I love you's' More 'I'm sorry's.' 

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute, look at it and really see it... live it and never give it back.  STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!!!

Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.  Instead, let's cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.  

Never ending divisions... is there still hope?

"The world has been created for everyone's use, but you few rich are trying to keep it for yourselves.  For not merely the possession of the earth, but the very sky, the air, and the sea are claimed for the use of the rich few... The earth belongs to all, not just to the rich."   

This is a very interesting quote that I came across this weekend while I was at home.  When do you think it was written?  It most definitely sounds like something we would hear said today in a time when many people have decided to work towards "ending global poverty", in a time when many are becoming more involved in social activism.  It makes sense that this would be said now in a time were the division between the rich and the poor simply continues to grow and has become a vast divide.  Venture a guess, when do you think the above quote was written? 

Ambrose of Milan wrote these powerful words in De Nabuthe 3 (Early History of Greed) which was written between 340-97.  When I first read the quote I immediately thought it was a recent quote.  When I found out when it was actually written I felt very shaken inside.  This was written so long ago, yet it seems to be the same situation today.  Has anything really changed? Or has the problem gotten worse? There is no denying the fact in the past 50 years the gap has grown.  How do we maintain hope in a seemingly hopeless situation where no apparent change has happened in over 1500 years? 

I think that Mother Theresa said it best when she said "You cannot do large things, only small things with love."  Despite the fact that things do not appear to have changed on a large scale does not mean we should not still try to change the world for the better.  However perhaps our methods of changing the world are to grandiose, to ambitious.  Have we lost the humanity in development work? Have we become to caught up in the statistics, to caught up in the large numbers to remember that helping one person does indeed change the world for the better.  By helping one person you have indeed made a difference, you made the world of difference to the person you helped.  

It is like the starfish story by Loren Eisley (one of my favorite stories to this day).  

One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.  Approaching the boy, her asked, "What are you doing?" The youth replied, "Throwing starfish back into the ocean.  The surf is up and tide is going out.  If I don't throw them back, they'll die."  "Son," the man said, "don't you realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish? You can't make a difference!" After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish, and threw is back into the surf.  Then, smiling at the man, he said... "I made a difference for that one."  

It is extremely disappointing to realize that a problem we have been trying to work towards correcting for such a long time has not been fixed, but it is important to realize that a difference made in an individual life is extremely important too.  A difference made in one persons life can begin a chain of events of people helping people.  It is like in the movie Pay it Forward.  By helping individuals through acts of love and kindness a young boy was able to begin a chain reaction of people helping other people.  This is the kind of thing that makes a difference, it impacts individuals, creates community and fosters a sense of humanization and belonging.  When we help others through random act of kindness and with love in out hearts then it is a selfless act that can lead the betterment of the world.  We run into problems when we start to help people with strings attached, with conditions.  Helping people with strings attached is just another form of control.  It is one more thing strengthening the gap. 

We need to learn that we cannot do large things, only small things with love! Love is the one things that has the power to reverse to disastrous direction our world is heading in.  Love for one another and the world around us is the most powerful unifying force that recognizes humanity and looks for similarities to link us together rather then differences to separate us.  

Don't do nothing because you can't do everything.  Do something.  Anything.  

- Colleen Patrick-Goudreau

You may think that your actions are meaningless and that they won't help, but that is no excuse, you must still act. 

- Gandhi